Best. sex. ever. I love discovering new things even after eleven years of marriage. I love when he discovers new ways to take care of me and blow my mind even more than the last time.
And I love that this journey took awhile to discover. I definitely remember those early years. Actually, I barely remember them now. But I realize they were there and I realize without them I might not appreciate the mind-blowing sex so much today ;) .
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
My kneescapades
While geocaching with Shawners I managed to poke a branch into my knee and the bottom of my foot. I guess that's what I get for wearing flip flops in the woods. Gotta learn to geocache a bit better! Shawners was my hero and pulled the definitely bigger than a splinter chunk o branch out of my knee after I worked on trying to get it out for half an hour, hurting my back in the process. Then, I'm so stressed from hearing Brando's Mom meltdown/vent over the phone that left her feeling better and left me stressed as heck about her I forgot to walk the way I'm supposed to and overemphasized the way I stress walk because I was thinking that was the way I was supposed to until I realized otherwise tonight thank goodness! Oh yes but not before I realized that I locked my keys in my car. Haha! Today was not my day! Though the door lock kid did tell me I still look pretty without my makeup on when I handed him my license and told him that's what I normally look like, well, with my makeup on instead of my haphazard tennis shoe and dress wearing persona I can't believe I walked out the door in. Ha! I asked Brando if he had something to do with what the kid said ;) . Green lights still love me though since my free week last week I neglected to post about where I got something randomly free every day of the week and green lights loved me all week :) . Any way, to leave you with a little visual of my day today...
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Things that make a blogger happy
Blogger has added a new feature to their post home page. A count of the views each post has had. This is such a dorky, stalker blogger thing to be excited about, but I totally am. See that little graph with the squiggly line all the way to the right? That's how many views that post has had.
These are the median figures. Most fall way below and a few that are higher. There was a post about finally succumbing to Pinterest that had 1200 views! Such a dorky thing to be excited about, but I so am. There used to be sites like StatCounter and even more in depth, Google Analysis, that would show you all these stats. I used to track my main blog for a bit, but would lose interest after a month or two, because it was so much work to match up stats and see what was working and what wasn't. I love blogging, but not that much, apparently. At least not that much for traffic, any way. I LOVE that Blogger has now integrated so MANY of these features, with this new blog view count feature at a glance being the latest. Eek! :)
These are the median figures. Most fall way below and a few that are higher. There was a post about finally succumbing to Pinterest that had 1200 views! Such a dorky thing to be excited about, but I so am. There used to be sites like StatCounter and even more in depth, Google Analysis, that would show you all these stats. I used to track my main blog for a bit, but would lose interest after a month or two, because it was so much work to match up stats and see what was working and what wasn't. I love blogging, but not that much, apparently. At least not that much for traffic, any way. I LOVE that Blogger has now integrated so MANY of these features, with this new blog view count feature at a glance being the latest. Eek! :)
Minecraft
I've been in a constant conflict about a video game the boys play called Minecraft. On one hand, it's a video game. On the other hand, the amount of imagination it requires to play the game at all is more than I can come up with in one day. Read the following excerpt from a blog post by a STEM Camp counselor and you'll understand my confliction, especially if you feel the same way about video games that I do. I like how he assimilates Minecraft to Legos. What are your thoughts?
"I’ll probably also be posting a lot about Minecraft, our game of the day (and probably the week). At one point in the seminar, we were watching a film about Notch, the creator, while the game ran in half of the computer screens in the room.
It’s a great game to have running. You have a whole world – many whole worlds, some of which are just gorgeous – where you can explore, mine, break all of the rules, and be creative. I saw chicken bombs, canons, currents – all things that the kids made themselves. It’s like Legos but magic – a glorious exercise for imagination and curiosity, which some say are increasingly lacking in our culture. Oh, and it’s fun – and it gets that much more fun when almost the whole class is playing!"
"I’ll probably also be posting a lot about Minecraft, our game of the day (and probably the week). At one point in the seminar, we were watching a film about Notch, the creator, while the game ran in half of the computer screens in the room.
It’s a great game to have running. You have a whole world – many whole worlds, some of which are just gorgeous – where you can explore, mine, break all of the rules, and be creative. I saw chicken bombs, canons, currents – all things that the kids made themselves. It’s like Legos but magic – a glorious exercise for imagination and curiosity, which some say are increasingly lacking in our culture. Oh, and it’s fun – and it gets that much more fun when almost the whole class is playing!"
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Monday, June 11, 2012
Change my ways
Today I realized when I tell Justin "don't push your brothers buttons" when he is a volunteer leader for Shawners vbs group I am essentially telling him that is exactly what I expect him to do. Thank God my sister was on call and available and gave me the words to tell him, "I retract my earlier statement and say instead I trust you to be mature, to be the responsible one, to be the adult, and I trust you to be a good teacher." The beaming smile on his face was worth my fumbling inadequacies as a mother earlier and my own slap in the face realization that I had previously told him, "I don't expect you to do well, I expect you to push your brother's buttons and therefore I am telling you not to." What a world of difference a choice of words makes.
Today I change my ways to tell my boys all the great things I expect of them, but instead of in my mind, outloud, in the form of "I trust you" to do exactly what I expect they will do in my mind. Which is, to be great leaders, to be men of great decision, great character, great morals, gigantic heart. As Brando's Opa once said about Brando, "He is kind in his soul." I believe all these things of my boys, and today I change my ways to tell them so in the form of "I trust you" to do this.
I feel so strange coming to this realization, almost born again. Like a revelation has been revealed to me, a veil lifted from my eyes on how to trust my boys and develop them into the leaders I so desperately fall asleep every night crossing my fingers and toes desiring them to be.
And because I love how Teagan always puts things to songs, these are the two songs that come to mind thinking about this. The first one I thought of immediately when I thought of the title for this post. The second I thought of as I typed the first sentence in the paragraph before this, and also happens to be a song that helped carry me through the last month of craziness.
Mumford and Sons - The Cave
especially:
"I know my call despite my faults"
"But I will hold on hope"
"And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again"
"You can understand dependence
When you know the maker's land"
Florence and the Machines - No Light No Light -
Especially:
"it's so easy,
To say it to a crowd
But it's so hard, my love,
To say it to you out loud"
and
"Tell me what you want me to say
You want a revelation,
You wanna get it right
But, it's a conversation,"
Today I change my ways to tell my boys all the great things I expect of them, but instead of in my mind, outloud, in the form of "I trust you" to do exactly what I expect they will do in my mind. Which is, to be great leaders, to be men of great decision, great character, great morals, gigantic heart. As Brando's Opa once said about Brando, "He is kind in his soul." I believe all these things of my boys, and today I change my ways to tell them so in the form of "I trust you" to do this.
I feel so strange coming to this realization, almost born again. Like a revelation has been revealed to me, a veil lifted from my eyes on how to trust my boys and develop them into the leaders I so desperately fall asleep every night crossing my fingers and toes desiring them to be.
And because I love how Teagan always puts things to songs, these are the two songs that come to mind thinking about this. The first one I thought of immediately when I thought of the title for this post. The second I thought of as I typed the first sentence in the paragraph before this, and also happens to be a song that helped carry me through the last month of craziness.
Mumford and Sons - The Cave
especially:
"I know my call despite my faults"
"But I will hold on hope"
"And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again"
"You can understand dependence
When you know the maker's land"
Florence and the Machines - No Light No Light -
Especially:
"it's so easy,
To say it to a crowd
But it's so hard, my love,
To say it to you out loud"
and
"Tell me what you want me to say
You want a revelation,
You wanna get it right
But, it's a conversation,"
Friday, June 8, 2012
Brene Brown on the Power of Vulnerability
Check out this top top viewed video from Brene Brown on the Power of Vulnerability speaking at TED (which stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design) Talks:
Speaking of TED Talks - fascinating and inspiring speakers definitely worth checking out! You can search them on YouTube.
Speaking of TED Talks - fascinating and inspiring speakers definitely worth checking out! You can search them on YouTube.
Steve jobs biography
It was the brighter side of what would become known as his reality distortion field. "If you trust him, you can do things," Holmes said. "If he's decided that something should happen, then he's just going to make it happen." Atari and India p. 52
Bushnell agreed. "There is something indefinable in an entrepreneur, and I saw that in Steve," he said. "He was interested not just in engineering, but also the business aspects. I taught him that I'd you act like you can do something, then it will work. I told him, 'Pretend to be completely in control and people will assume that you are.' " Atari and India p. 55
"The Apple Marketing Philosophy" stressed three points... Empathy, an intimate connection with the feelings of the customer. "We will truly understand their needs better than any other company." The second was focus: "In order to do a good job of those things that we decide to do, we must eliminate all of the unimportant opportunities." The third and equally important principle, awkwardly named, was impute. It emphasized that people form an opinion about a company or product based on the signals that it conveys. "People DO judge a book by its cover," he wrote. "We may have the best profit, the highest quality, the most useful software, etc.; if we present them in a slipshod manner, they will be perceived as slipshod; if we present them in a creative, professional manner, we will impute the desired qualities." The Apple II p. 79
"If it could save a person's life, would you find a way to shave ten seconds off the boot time?" he asked. Kenyon allowed that he probably could. Jobs went to a whiteboard and showed that if there were five million people using the Mac, and it took ten seconds extra to turn it on every day, that added up to three hundred million or so hits per year that people would save, which was the equivalent of at least one hundred lifetimes saved per yet. "Larry was suitably impressed and a few weeks layer he came back and it booted up twenty-eight seconds faster," Atkinson recalled. "Steve had a way of motivating by looking at the bigger picture." The Reality Distortion Field p. 123
"Jobs thought of himself as an artist c and he encouraged the design team to think of ourselves that way too," said Hertzfeld. "The goal was never to beat the competition, or to make a lot of money. It was to do the greatest thing possible, or even a little greater." The Reality Distortion Field p. 123
"I've learned over the years that when you have really good people you don't have to baby them," Jobs later explained. "By expecting them to do great things, you can get them to do great things. The original Mac team taught me that A-plus players like to work together, and they don't like it of you tolerate B work. Ask any member of that Mac team. They will tell you it was worth the pain." The Reality Distortion Field p. 124
As with Eichler homes, the artistic sensibility was combined with the capability for mass production. The Design p. 126
Apple's design mantra would remain the one features on its first brochure: "Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." The Design p. 127
Jobs felt that design simplicity should be linked to making products easy to use. These goals do not always go together. Sometimes a design can be so sleek and simple that a user finds it intimidating or unfriendly to navigate. "The main thing in our design is that we have to make things intuitively obvious," Jobs told the crowd of design mavens. For example, he extolled the desktop metaphor he was creating for the Macintosh. "People know how to deal with a desktop intuitively. If you walk into an office, there are papers on the desk. The one on the top is the most important. People know how to switch priority. Part of the reason we model our computers on metaphors like the desktop is that we can leverage this experience people already have." The Design p. 127
"Great art stretches the taste, it doesn't follow tastes." The Design p. 128
Bushnell agreed. "There is something indefinable in an entrepreneur, and I saw that in Steve," he said. "He was interested not just in engineering, but also the business aspects. I taught him that I'd you act like you can do something, then it will work. I told him, 'Pretend to be completely in control and people will assume that you are.' " Atari and India p. 55
"The Apple Marketing Philosophy" stressed three points... Empathy, an intimate connection with the feelings of the customer. "We will truly understand their needs better than any other company." The second was focus: "In order to do a good job of those things that we decide to do, we must eliminate all of the unimportant opportunities." The third and equally important principle, awkwardly named, was impute. It emphasized that people form an opinion about a company or product based on the signals that it conveys. "People DO judge a book by its cover," he wrote. "We may have the best profit, the highest quality, the most useful software, etc.; if we present them in a slipshod manner, they will be perceived as slipshod; if we present them in a creative, professional manner, we will impute the desired qualities." The Apple II p. 79
"If it could save a person's life, would you find a way to shave ten seconds off the boot time?" he asked. Kenyon allowed that he probably could. Jobs went to a whiteboard and showed that if there were five million people using the Mac, and it took ten seconds extra to turn it on every day, that added up to three hundred million or so hits per year that people would save, which was the equivalent of at least one hundred lifetimes saved per yet. "Larry was suitably impressed and a few weeks layer he came back and it booted up twenty-eight seconds faster," Atkinson recalled. "Steve had a way of motivating by looking at the bigger picture." The Reality Distortion Field p. 123
"Jobs thought of himself as an artist c and he encouraged the design team to think of ourselves that way too," said Hertzfeld. "The goal was never to beat the competition, or to make a lot of money. It was to do the greatest thing possible, or even a little greater." The Reality Distortion Field p. 123
"I've learned over the years that when you have really good people you don't have to baby them," Jobs later explained. "By expecting them to do great things, you can get them to do great things. The original Mac team taught me that A-plus players like to work together, and they don't like it of you tolerate B work. Ask any member of that Mac team. They will tell you it was worth the pain." The Reality Distortion Field p. 124
As with Eichler homes, the artistic sensibility was combined with the capability for mass production. The Design p. 126
Apple's design mantra would remain the one features on its first brochure: "Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." The Design p. 127
Jobs felt that design simplicity should be linked to making products easy to use. These goals do not always go together. Sometimes a design can be so sleek and simple that a user finds it intimidating or unfriendly to navigate. "The main thing in our design is that we have to make things intuitively obvious," Jobs told the crowd of design mavens. For example, he extolled the desktop metaphor he was creating for the Macintosh. "People know how to deal with a desktop intuitively. If you walk into an office, there are papers on the desk. The one on the top is the most important. People know how to switch priority. Part of the reason we model our computers on metaphors like the desktop is that we can leverage this experience people already have." The Design p. 127
"Great art stretches the taste, it doesn't follow tastes." The Design p. 128
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Wow, eight pages into Steve Jobs biography and I am totally fascinated. Looks like it might be one of those books where there's so much information, different concepts, and intriguing new perspectives to wrap my head around I'm going to have to pause every ten pages or so to let it sink in. So many issues already in these first eight pages that I can relate to. Fascination with new things, a regular home life, "abandoned, chosen, special" as was the theme in his early years, Silicon Valley - my home grounds, not a salesman but a gentle persistent father (reminds me of Brando). LOVE it so far, and can't wait to let these first eight pages sink in so I can keep reading. The big names of personal friends he knew - Hewlett, Packard, Polaroid, is FASCINATING. Even more so that he knew these guys before they were big. Recognized, appreciated, and took the time to knew before they were big.
Brando's made our room pretty
Part of our decluttering has been rearranging, and Brando rearranged our room to this. Pretty sure I mentioned this before, but it's worth saying again to me, my armoire is in our closet now and I feel like a queen getting dressed in our walk in closet. It's like having my own personal dressing room.
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
I miss you, friend
This felt a little too personal and raw for facebook where I originally intended to post it. We'll see if it makes it there:
My childhood and still best friend liked this photo and I had to repost it to explain something about me. This is why I generally don't say I miss you (unless I realize there's absolutely no way I can see you right now even if I bought a plane ticket), also why I don't call you friend. I'll show you I missed you or show you you're my friend. You'll know you're my friend and you'll know I miss you by the effort I make to spend time with you and the lengths I'll go to to make that happen (ie amount of time away from my family, drive time, schedule hopscotching, cost just to get to you, not just seeing you "when I'm free"), not by my words. I've had enough empty words in my life for a lifetime and I have a husband to learn from that proves every word he says or doesn't say through instant action.
...and a random photo from a month ago that I decided to finally text Brando today :) .
My childhood and still best friend liked this photo and I had to repost it to explain something about me. This is why I generally don't say I miss you (unless I realize there's absolutely no way I can see you right now even if I bought a plane ticket), also why I don't call you friend. I'll show you I missed you or show you you're my friend. You'll know you're my friend and you'll know I miss you by the effort I make to spend time with you and the lengths I'll go to to make that happen (ie amount of time away from my family, drive time, schedule hopscotching, cost just to get to you, not just seeing you "when I'm free"), not by my words. I've had enough empty words in my life for a lifetime and I have a husband to learn from that proves every word he says or doesn't say through instant action.
...and a random photo from a month ago that I decided to finally text Brando today :) .
Monday, June 4, 2012
Transitions
Transitions are always hard for me - Christmas break, schedule or routine change, summer break. This makes it a whole heck of a lot easier.
Sleep
Man I used to sleep like a rock. Ever since I found out we thought we were pregnant my sleep has been anxiety filled, up early in the am, not able to go back to sleep sleep. And the past few nights have been riddled with nightmares not even related to my thoughts during the day but deep seeded insecurities only remotely visited during the day by a very very long rabbit trail. Craziness and I'm ready for it to be over!!
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Work in progress
But an improvement. That far wall needs something. Maybe those two photos and a different photo over the dresser basket dealio, but this is what we worked on yesterday and I love it. Brando did all the cute little decorations. He has an eye for it. I don't. I kinda slap it all on there and hate it when I'm done. He thoughtfully arranges and places things and I love it when he's done. My armoire is in the closet now and OMG I love not having to walk naked across my room and sometimes open doorway to get to my clothes for the day. Only difficulty is Brando gets dressed in the same closet which can lead to being interrupted for me.. but that could also be considered a plus ;) .
Saturday, June 2, 2012
I love my little garden!!
These caladium (I think?) leaves with the hot pink middles and another one we got with burgundy middle of the leaves are the prettiest leaves I've ever seen!
Friday, June 1, 2012
Summer!!
We've had one car for awhile so I've been chauffeuring like mad. Little glad for it to calm down a bit with the boys last day of school today.
Brando's promotion meant a bit of a pay cut in a way. He is getting paid more per hour but is now salary so no overtime. Fortunately he's also working less hours (I think :/) but has yet to make up for it in business hours meaning more money for us.
How do people *do* it with families??!! Somehow my parents did it but I'm starting to wonder how the heck they did!! I always thought we'd be further along by now but the bills keep getting bigger and even though the paychecks are bigger they still aren't getting bigger than the expenses. Part of my issue is I want my boys to have EVERY opportunity possible which quite possibly may have us going broke in the meantime. BUT we'd spend the money any way and they'd have no opportunities. My goal is for them to know what they want to do and do it, whatever it takes. But also to be able to do it with ease so they can still find the one God has for them and have a family (can't WAIT for grand babies when they are started on what passions God has given them).
Lots of fun stuff lined up this summer. Justinbustin is gung ho and Shawners is more laid back. Wisely Justinbustin did not want to book more than four weeks of camps or VBSs, and Shawners didn't want to do ANY camps, only two VBSes. In between time, I am wanting to take them fishing, wake boarding, and geo caching. Older boy things. Still learning what those are! We'll see how it pans out!
Brando's promotion meant a bit of a pay cut in a way. He is getting paid more per hour but is now salary so no overtime. Fortunately he's also working less hours (I think :/) but has yet to make up for it in business hours meaning more money for us.
How do people *do* it with families??!! Somehow my parents did it but I'm starting to wonder how the heck they did!! I always thought we'd be further along by now but the bills keep getting bigger and even though the paychecks are bigger they still aren't getting bigger than the expenses. Part of my issue is I want my boys to have EVERY opportunity possible which quite possibly may have us going broke in the meantime. BUT we'd spend the money any way and they'd have no opportunities. My goal is for them to know what they want to do and do it, whatever it takes. But also to be able to do it with ease so they can still find the one God has for them and have a family (can't WAIT for grand babies when they are started on what passions God has given them).
Lots of fun stuff lined up this summer. Justinbustin is gung ho and Shawners is more laid back. Wisely Justinbustin did not want to book more than four weeks of camps or VBSs, and Shawners didn't want to do ANY camps, only two VBSes. In between time, I am wanting to take them fishing, wake boarding, and geo caching. Older boy things. Still learning what those are! We'll see how it pans out!
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