This kid is growing up on me. The other day Justinbustin said to me, "Everybody has a facebook, Mom." Mom intuition that we have, I realize this may be literal and meant to include him. Today I looked up his friend's facebook via the friend's mom's facebook and looked at his friends (stalkerish, I know, that's how we Moms find things out these days I guess). Sure enough, there was Justinbustin under a pseudo name. I added him as a friend, then texted Brando about it. Brando's response? "Hmmm... Well. Yeah. Just make it positive. You don't necessarily need his password. Just be his friend." Wiser words were never spoken to calm me down. I grabbed his computer to see if there was anything else I needed to be concerned about - nothing. That I could find, any way, which doesn't mean a lot. As soon as he woke up, I asked him what email he had it under as trying to log in to facebook under his email said there's no account with that email. I asked him about it, and sure enough, he has a junk email. I nonchalantly had him log into it while I sat there and asked him his password for that account, as well as his facebook account. Conversation over. Thank God for Brando settling me down, cuz I was ready to rant.
I'm learning these days to not react so knee jerkishly to everything. It's my instinct and it's necessary sometimes. Other times, things are going to happen a certain way and a knee jerk reaction is going to make a mountain out of a molehill. It's really difficult, though.
For example, right now, I want to knee jerk reaction to the different style Shawner's new teacher has. But it's just that. A different style. He's doing okay. Yesterday, he said he had a "good day, I guess", which tells me he's having a bit of a transition period. I need one, too. Especially when I go in every Wednesday to do folders and things aren't organized as they were with the previous teacher, and when I hear her instructing the kids completely differently than his previous teacher, or when I see the kids line up and her instructing when the previous teacher didn't ever say a word. She's not the previous teacher, and she won't be. As long as the kids are okay, that's the important thing. It makes me cry, either way, and want to mama bear insist that she be exactly like the other teacher as I chose to believe she would be beforehand.
Showing posts with label boys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boys. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Who I Am
I just realized something about myself. When I feel like an injustice has been done, I cut the person I feel was responsible out of the picture. Especially when it comes to my son. This can be a detrimental thing.
Justinbustin went on a boy scout camping trip and got bit 72+ times by chiggers. His reaction to bug bites is pretty intense - in other words you gasp when you look at the swollen bites on his leg. He's staying home from sch*ol for the second day today. The boy scout trip he went on was a black *ps mission trip. Only. He didn't get to do the super boy fun black *ps part. He had to man a station. Because he's on the A team/leadership team. First off, I've always been a little pissy that they didn't freakin' assign him a leadership position in the first place when they were assigning everybody else from his pack a position. I had to freakin' email and ask. Only then did they 'come up' with a few positions that they offered him. Both which kinda sucked in my opinion - troop secretary or quartermaster (takes inventory of all supplies). It actually makes me see red thinking about it. I didn't say anything. He took on quartermaster and has been doing something (I think) with it since. Not really much, because his position isn't required for every trip like I would love it to be, but he does something sometimes. That made me mad. I felt that was an injustice. But I let it ride.
Now. As a result, he is on the A-Team/leadership team which is kinda cool because not a lot of kids are on it. At the same time, not a lot of kids are on it besides all the Dads. So when it's only him and one other kid, and that other kid has to go home early, guess who's stuck eating by himself with all the Dads? Yeah. He kinda liked that part, but it PISSed me off, especially since HIS dad wasn't there. In addition, the whole not being part of the black *ps thing? He said he had to be manning a station because he was on the A team. So here he goes to this event he's super looking forward to, nobody tells him he won't be allowed to participate, I spend $66 buying stupid effen (sorry, I'm really mad) supplies for said black *ps that ALL the other kids end up flippin' using, comes home covered in chiggers, and gets tears in his eyes every time I ask him about what happened that night.
Not only am I RAGING MAMA BEAR MAD, I also start to wonder did something else happen? At some point, he's the only kid with a bunch of Dads. NOT EXACTLY the buddy system they are supposed to have. This part really gets me mad. What else happened? Brando says to stop questioning Justinbustin, but I'm not going to. Why is my son getting tears in his eyes when I ask him about a darn campout?
Okay. So all that. Then, I realize, I just want to take him out of the troop. I am done. SO DONE. And then I start crying the minute I type that because that is the dumbest way to go. But I am SO MAD I want to get back at these people and take away my precious son from them so they can't hurt him anymore. Then, I realize, that's what I did with his youth group (he's now transitioned into one that he goes to up here with a good friend from school) when the leader tried to convince me to hold him back in effen youth group and Justinbustin cried many tears saying his friends are where he's at and he doesn't want to be held back in youth group - it's already happened at school through no fault of his own (his birthday affected it, and the fact that when we first put him in school we put him a grade higher because the grade he should've gone in was full, which we evened out later). I don't want to do what I did with youth group with boy scouts, too.
Then, I realize, this is what I did with Jer*my. The biological Dad. When he decided he didn't want to be a part of our lives, I cut him out. I said okay. See ya. I am SO DONE with you. And I think I've been doing it ever since. I realized I did it with me, but I was fine with that. I was fine with cutting people out of my life who didn't deserve to be there. Now, if I do that to my son, he will miss out on some amazing opportunities he is privileged to be a part of. Now that I think about it, maybe I have missed out on some amazing opportunities myself, but I haven't cared. I can't do that to him, especially when he does care, and when he does have a choice.
So. Going forward. I realize what we SHOULD've done with youth group. We should've gotten involved. Been a part of what was going on. Instead of resisting, we should've been part of the solution. So now I am going to ask Brando to step up his involvement with Justinbustin's boy scouts - be there for the next few meetings. Figure out what is going on and how he can help Justinbustin be the leader I realize he wants to be. Figure out why he may be being ostracized. Is he not stepping up enough? Are they stepping on him? WHAT is going on?! And note to myself MAKE SURE you know who Justinbustin is riding with. This last time he rode with a guy I've only talked to once, this was the same guy who told him he couldn't do the black *ps. Maybe he was trying to be helpful, I don't know, but I am friends with most of the dads, and this one is not my friend. Make sure next time he ONLY goes with those who are my friends. There was one there who is my friend, but I thought I'd let Justinbustin go a little this time and not make a big deal out of him going with that person like I have in the past. Big mistake. Next time, he goes with a friend, and I am going to tell him so so that he is the one that can make sure it happens.
Justinbustin went on a boy scout camping trip and got bit 72+ times by chiggers. His reaction to bug bites is pretty intense - in other words you gasp when you look at the swollen bites on his leg. He's staying home from sch*ol for the second day today. The boy scout trip he went on was a black *ps mission trip. Only. He didn't get to do the super boy fun black *ps part. He had to man a station. Because he's on the A team/leadership team. First off, I've always been a little pissy that they didn't freakin' assign him a leadership position in the first place when they were assigning everybody else from his pack a position. I had to freakin' email and ask. Only then did they 'come up' with a few positions that they offered him. Both which kinda sucked in my opinion - troop secretary or quartermaster (takes inventory of all supplies). It actually makes me see red thinking about it. I didn't say anything. He took on quartermaster and has been doing something (I think) with it since. Not really much, because his position isn't required for every trip like I would love it to be, but he does something sometimes. That made me mad. I felt that was an injustice. But I let it ride.
Now. As a result, he is on the A-Team/leadership team which is kinda cool because not a lot of kids are on it. At the same time, not a lot of kids are on it besides all the Dads. So when it's only him and one other kid, and that other kid has to go home early, guess who's stuck eating by himself with all the Dads? Yeah. He kinda liked that part, but it PISSed me off, especially since HIS dad wasn't there. In addition, the whole not being part of the black *ps thing? He said he had to be manning a station because he was on the A team. So here he goes to this event he's super looking forward to, nobody tells him he won't be allowed to participate, I spend $66 buying stupid effen (sorry, I'm really mad) supplies for said black *ps that ALL the other kids end up flippin' using, comes home covered in chiggers, and gets tears in his eyes every time I ask him about what happened that night.
Not only am I RAGING MAMA BEAR MAD, I also start to wonder did something else happen? At some point, he's the only kid with a bunch of Dads. NOT EXACTLY the buddy system they are supposed to have. This part really gets me mad. What else happened? Brando says to stop questioning Justinbustin, but I'm not going to. Why is my son getting tears in his eyes when I ask him about a darn campout?
Okay. So all that. Then, I realize, I just want to take him out of the troop. I am done. SO DONE. And then I start crying the minute I type that because that is the dumbest way to go. But I am SO MAD I want to get back at these people and take away my precious son from them so they can't hurt him anymore. Then, I realize, that's what I did with his youth group (he's now transitioned into one that he goes to up here with a good friend from school) when the leader tried to convince me to hold him back in effen youth group and Justinbustin cried many tears saying his friends are where he's at and he doesn't want to be held back in youth group - it's already happened at school through no fault of his own (his birthday affected it, and the fact that when we first put him in school we put him a grade higher because the grade he should've gone in was full, which we evened out later). I don't want to do what I did with youth group with boy scouts, too.
Then, I realize, this is what I did with Jer*my. The biological Dad. When he decided he didn't want to be a part of our lives, I cut him out. I said okay. See ya. I am SO DONE with you. And I think I've been doing it ever since. I realized I did it with me, but I was fine with that. I was fine with cutting people out of my life who didn't deserve to be there. Now, if I do that to my son, he will miss out on some amazing opportunities he is privileged to be a part of. Now that I think about it, maybe I have missed out on some amazing opportunities myself, but I haven't cared. I can't do that to him, especially when he does care, and when he does have a choice.
So. Going forward. I realize what we SHOULD've done with youth group. We should've gotten involved. Been a part of what was going on. Instead of resisting, we should've been part of the solution. So now I am going to ask Brando to step up his involvement with Justinbustin's boy scouts - be there for the next few meetings. Figure out what is going on and how he can help Justinbustin be the leader I realize he wants to be. Figure out why he may be being ostracized. Is he not stepping up enough? Are they stepping on him? WHAT is going on?! And note to myself MAKE SURE you know who Justinbustin is riding with. This last time he rode with a guy I've only talked to once, this was the same guy who told him he couldn't do the black *ps. Maybe he was trying to be helpful, I don't know, but I am friends with most of the dads, and this one is not my friend. Make sure next time he ONLY goes with those who are my friends. There was one there who is my friend, but I thought I'd let Justinbustin go a little this time and not make a big deal out of him going with that person like I have in the past. Big mistake. Next time, he goes with a friend, and I am going to tell him so so that he is the one that can make sure it happens.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Clusterf...
This weekend has turned out to be a bit of a cluster faux pas. Originally I had a girls' weekend to go to, so the boys had planned a sleepover in my absence. Because, let's face it, I'll go nuts having more than four boys in close proximity to me in a two bedroom apartment. When my girls' weekend had to be cancelled due to an emergency, all of a sudden I was left with the prospect of having seven boys in my two bedroom apartment with me!!! Enter instant panic mode.
Originally I had thought the weekend would go back to the way it would've been had I been staying in town - Justinbustin off on a camping trip, and to a youth group event, Brando and I would have our much needed for me date night Saturday evening, we'd have a lazy Sunday and that'd be it.
Only Justinbustin had already called all of his friends, and instead of me just saying what I wanted, I was trying to be nice and beating around the bush by not saying I CAN'T HANDLE SEVEN BOYS IN A TWO BEDROOM APARTMENT AND IT'S TOO LATE OF NOTICE FOR ME TO SPEND THE NIGHT ELSEWHERE! Eventually, Brando did come to that conclusion through my freaking out about EVERYthing (sorry, honey).
And the compromise was he'll have his birthday party next week - we'll barbeque to keep them mostly out of the house in evening, then taking them kayaking in the morning to get them out of the house early. Whew. He didn't end up going camping, which is fine, and he will go to the youth group event this evening, and possibly have one friend go with him and possibly spend the night.
A good compromise, and after talking to my KT this morning, I finally have my head screwed back on straight. I was giving her boyfriend advice and realized I needed to take it for myself! We both laughed when I realized that and decided we weren't going to let stressors keep us from enjoying our weekend.
So I promptly got off the phone with her and mapped out an afternoon of visiting local wineries with Brando (my stressor being not having time with Brando this weekend and him not setting time aside for me this weekend). We may not do it, but at least if we do get the time together we'll have something to do together that will fill up my needed time with Brando quota extremely well!
Originally I had thought the weekend would go back to the way it would've been had I been staying in town - Justinbustin off on a camping trip, and to a youth group event, Brando and I would have our much needed for me date night Saturday evening, we'd have a lazy Sunday and that'd be it.
Only Justinbustin had already called all of his friends, and instead of me just saying what I wanted, I was trying to be nice and beating around the bush by not saying I CAN'T HANDLE SEVEN BOYS IN A TWO BEDROOM APARTMENT AND IT'S TOO LATE OF NOTICE FOR ME TO SPEND THE NIGHT ELSEWHERE! Eventually, Brando did come to that conclusion through my freaking out about EVERYthing (sorry, honey).
And the compromise was he'll have his birthday party next week - we'll barbeque to keep them mostly out of the house in evening, then taking them kayaking in the morning to get them out of the house early. Whew. He didn't end up going camping, which is fine, and he will go to the youth group event this evening, and possibly have one friend go with him and possibly spend the night.
A good compromise, and after talking to my KT this morning, I finally have my head screwed back on straight. I was giving her boyfriend advice and realized I needed to take it for myself! We both laughed when I realized that and decided we weren't going to let stressors keep us from enjoying our weekend.
So I promptly got off the phone with her and mapped out an afternoon of visiting local wineries with Brando (my stressor being not having time with Brando this weekend and him not setting time aside for me this weekend). We may not do it, but at least if we do get the time together we'll have something to do together that will fill up my needed time with Brando quota extremely well!
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Dear Life,
Refocusing on Brando and the boys, thank you for opening my eyes to many things, one of which my main blog sort of feels like a friend I need to focus on less. I love dumping my thoughts here, because there's hardly any readership (and I love all that do read here!), but dumping my thoughts there seems too vulnerable. And organizing my thoughts in a sane manner takes too much energy. I may save you, dear blog, for pictures of trips and call it good over there. It's been fun to revamp, though, and try new things. That, above all, I believe, showed me that it's not worth my energy over there.
Stores, thank you for all the GORGEOUS summer clothes out! I went crazy town at forever 21 and can't wait to model my new wardrobe for Brando on dates.
Summer, how can you be so near? I can't believe this may actually be the last summer that Justinbustin will sorta do what I want because he has to. Fortunately, he loves outdoor activity as much as I, so that means I have an adventure buddy!
Girls weekend, I am so sad, you didn't work out. I can't wait til' you do!
My own weekend, I am kinda relieved that I can make you happen now. Justinbustin will get to go camping, go to a special event Saturday, and the boys won't have to be left alone Friday afternoon and Saturday morning.
Pool, why don't I go to you more often? Your sun rays were absolutely glorious yesterday and left the perfect tan line that I'm still olive oiling to get rid of the burn. Your water is still cool and refreshing.
Brando, thank you for being so awesome at figuring out new strategies. I can't believe the school changing the way parents could pick up could give me anxiety attacks! Thank you for relieving those by figuring out a new way to easily pick up the boys, and a way that they love, in an instant.
Boys, you are incredible when given responsibility. My prayer is that you will find ways to rise above, be a leader, and find your own things to be responsible for even when you aren't given responsibility.
KT, thank you for being my bestie. For sticking with me through thick and thin. For noticing my irritation yesterday, and not saying a thing, but simply showing up in your bathing suit with a towel and inviting me to go to the pool just so you could be silent and hear me vent. Thank you for knowing me well enough to know something is bothering me, and also knowing me well enough to not question me about it, but simply be there for me and let me tell you in my own time. You are amazing, and I don't know what I did to deserve your amazingness. I don't think I did anything, I think you just are that person and I'm so glad I know you.
Stores, thank you for all the GORGEOUS summer clothes out! I went crazy town at forever 21 and can't wait to model my new wardrobe for Brando on dates.
Summer, how can you be so near? I can't believe this may actually be the last summer that Justinbustin will sorta do what I want because he has to. Fortunately, he loves outdoor activity as much as I, so that means I have an adventure buddy!
Girls weekend, I am so sad, you didn't work out. I can't wait til' you do!
My own weekend, I am kinda relieved that I can make you happen now. Justinbustin will get to go camping, go to a special event Saturday, and the boys won't have to be left alone Friday afternoon and Saturday morning.
Pool, why don't I go to you more often? Your sun rays were absolutely glorious yesterday and left the perfect tan line that I'm still olive oiling to get rid of the burn. Your water is still cool and refreshing.
Brando, thank you for being so awesome at figuring out new strategies. I can't believe the school changing the way parents could pick up could give me anxiety attacks! Thank you for relieving those by figuring out a new way to easily pick up the boys, and a way that they love, in an instant.
Boys, you are incredible when given responsibility. My prayer is that you will find ways to rise above, be a leader, and find your own things to be responsible for even when you aren't given responsibility.
KT, thank you for being my bestie. For sticking with me through thick and thin. For noticing my irritation yesterday, and not saying a thing, but simply showing up in your bathing suit with a towel and inviting me to go to the pool just so you could be silent and hear me vent. Thank you for knowing me well enough to know something is bothering me, and also knowing me well enough to not question me about it, but simply be there for me and let me tell you in my own time. You are amazing, and I don't know what I did to deserve your amazingness. I don't think I did anything, I think you just are that person and I'm so glad I know you.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
My son just ran his first marathon
Totally of his own initiative!! I don't want to forget these moments...
*Shawners saying no less than ten times how much fun it was
*Shawners saying the best part was crossing the finish line and having the people hand him his medal and that he didn't even have to stop running
*Shawners loving that his medal is real metal and not plastic like his sports trophies and racecar derby medals
*Shawners saying the best part was getting the medal and having a kid hand him a bottle of water as he want by
*The feeling of pride in my heart and the tears welling up in my eyes as a result as I watched Shawners run by
*Shawner's leadership as we waited to be called from the stands and how he moved us to a group that was called at least half an hour to an hour ahead of the original group we stood in
*Shawner's leadership leading me through the crowd as I silently had a claustrophobic panic and anxiety attack from all the people
*Shawner's letting me know he was embarrassed that I was hanging onto his shirt but that it was okay because I was nervous and didn't want to get stuck far behind him
*Shawner's letting me know he would be embarrassed if I ran with him since he's a third grader and only kindergarten through second had to have a parent run with them, but that it would be okay if I did
*Shawner's leadership in arranging a spot to meet up after the finish line so we wouldn't lose each other
*Hearing him say over and over and over how much fun it was
*Letting him know there are other kid marathons if he wanted to continue running mararthons
*His initiative to join the running club and run this marathon today all on his own
*His excitement about continuing to run
*Realizing I would've never made it to a marathon, even one I wasn't running without him, because of my claustrophobia with the sheer number of people
*Realizing now that he's taken the initiative I could possibly do it again on my own
*So, so, SO proud of him for running his first marathon
*So, so, SO happy he's so very happy about it
*Shawners saying no less than ten times how much fun it was
*Shawners saying the best part was crossing the finish line and having the people hand him his medal and that he didn't even have to stop running
*Shawners loving that his medal is real metal and not plastic like his sports trophies and racecar derby medals
*Shawners saying the best part was getting the medal and having a kid hand him a bottle of water as he want by
*The feeling of pride in my heart and the tears welling up in my eyes as a result as I watched Shawners run by
*Shawner's leadership as we waited to be called from the stands and how he moved us to a group that was called at least half an hour to an hour ahead of the original group we stood in
*Shawner's leadership leading me through the crowd as I silently had a claustrophobic panic and anxiety attack from all the people
*Shawner's letting me know he was embarrassed that I was hanging onto his shirt but that it was okay because I was nervous and didn't want to get stuck far behind him
*Shawner's letting me know he would be embarrassed if I ran with him since he's a third grader and only kindergarten through second had to have a parent run with them, but that it would be okay if I did
*Shawner's leadership in arranging a spot to meet up after the finish line so we wouldn't lose each other
*Hearing him say over and over and over how much fun it was
*Letting him know there are other kid marathons if he wanted to continue running mararthons
*His initiative to join the running club and run this marathon today all on his own
*His excitement about continuing to run
*Realizing I would've never made it to a marathon, even one I wasn't running without him, because of my claustrophobia with the sheer number of people
*Realizing now that he's taken the initiative I could possibly do it again on my own
*So, so, SO proud of him for running his first marathon
*So, so, SO happy he's so very happy about it
Monday, February 14, 2011
Beautiful Sunday
As I sit here on Valentine's Day morning with my fresh cup of coffee and Brando's famous fruit salad, my heart is bursting with the fun of Saturday.
But, Sunday was amazing in it's own right. I'm not one to sit by the sidelines and let life pass me by - usually I take the reins and make sure things happen. So being down and under this week with my back has thrown me for a loop. This weekend I had to lay low - between my back and all the meds I just didn't have the energy to get us doing activities like I normally do. Saturday turned out amazing, thanks to Brando.
Sunday all I wanted to do was say good-bye to my girlfriend who is leaving for a month. I didn't expect us to do anything else, because normally I would be the one to plan that and I didn't for the aforementioned reasons. Brando did take me to say good-bye to my friend. We picked her up and meandered over to a beautiful grassy area in the middle of town where you can see the skyline. Her and I walked to the top of a hill to see the backdrop of the skyline with the grassy area all around us, then I dropped her back off where she needed to meet up with another friend, while the boys stayed and played.
While I was dropping my friend off, the boys discovered an impromptu circus. The performers had brought all their toys out to play - silk ropes, wheels that you stand on and pedal, tight ropes, hula hoops hanging from a tree, and more. My friend and I had seen them from atop the hill, but didn't think about asking what they were up to. The boys and Brando had been brave enough to ask, and when I got back were playing away.
We spent the next three hours there pedaling on the wheels, climbing up the silk ropes (well, the boys did - I would have if my back was not injured and almost did any way until Brando reminded me that I had just said I was at the point where my back is okay but if I do anything to strain it it feels like it would go right back), and hula hooping in the tree.
The boys also found out they meet every Sunday there. I pride myself on researching the heck out of my town and knowing every little in and out, but you just can't research things like this - groups of people spontaneously gathering to share their art. Letting go and letting Brando figure out what to do as a family was a new thing for me, and I would've taken the reins if I had the energy. But now I see what can happen with a little spontaneity and Brando taking the lead, and am more apt to let him take the lead more often.
But, Sunday was amazing in it's own right. I'm not one to sit by the sidelines and let life pass me by - usually I take the reins and make sure things happen. So being down and under this week with my back has thrown me for a loop. This weekend I had to lay low - between my back and all the meds I just didn't have the energy to get us doing activities like I normally do. Saturday turned out amazing, thanks to Brando.
Sunday all I wanted to do was say good-bye to my girlfriend who is leaving for a month. I didn't expect us to do anything else, because normally I would be the one to plan that and I didn't for the aforementioned reasons. Brando did take me to say good-bye to my friend. We picked her up and meandered over to a beautiful grassy area in the middle of town where you can see the skyline. Her and I walked to the top of a hill to see the backdrop of the skyline with the grassy area all around us, then I dropped her back off where she needed to meet up with another friend, while the boys stayed and played.
While I was dropping my friend off, the boys discovered an impromptu circus. The performers had brought all their toys out to play - silk ropes, wheels that you stand on and pedal, tight ropes, hula hoops hanging from a tree, and more. My friend and I had seen them from atop the hill, but didn't think about asking what they were up to. The boys and Brando had been brave enough to ask, and when I got back were playing away.
We spent the next three hours there pedaling on the wheels, climbing up the silk ropes (well, the boys did - I would have if my back was not injured and almost did any way until Brando reminded me that I had just said I was at the point where my back is okay but if I do anything to strain it it feels like it would go right back), and hula hooping in the tree.
The boys also found out they meet every Sunday there. I pride myself on researching the heck out of my town and knowing every little in and out, but you just can't research things like this - groups of people spontaneously gathering to share their art. Letting go and letting Brando figure out what to do as a family was a new thing for me, and I would've taken the reins if I had the energy. But now I see what can happen with a little spontaneity and Brando taking the lead, and am more apt to let him take the lead more often.
Friday, February 11, 2011
The Little Moments
*Brando singing Bruno Mars' "Just the Way You Are" to me when I ask him anything about how I look
*Dancing with my boys when Shawners danced to the radio outside the car when I picked him up from school, and when Justinbustin danced to the song playing on my computer. My favorite part is the spontaneity with which they break out into dance when they hear a song. I didn't do that as a kid and I LOVE that they do, and of course I dance with them. This afternoon when Justinbustin and I were dancing I said, "I love dancing with you guys." and he says, "I love it, too." Melt my heart.
*Being able to pick up and clean my house. I didn't know I could be so grateful for something so mundane, but being able to do it is a blessing.
*Brando setting up a couples' massage for him and I with my favorite masseuse for me. If nothing else good came out of me being in bed on my back the last week, this stands alone by itself. What a treat.
*Having good conversations with Justinbustin about schoolwork and setting up the perimeters of certain projects in school needing his full attention to details and other projects that aren't very important just need the requirements met and neat handwriting. I told him to let me know which category a project falls into so that I don't stress him out about schoolwork. I want him so desperately to know, "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might." Ecclesiastes 9:10, but the truth is certain projects in school just aren't worth your energy at the expense of other projects. And I can see the stress I put on him when I try to emphasize those unimportant subjects at the cost of the projects (and extracurricular) activities that DO matter.
*Our old, torn courch finding a new home in the garage as a hangout for the local neighborhood kids and the boys as they put the space heater on, play their DS, bike around, play ball, play music, and chat. I didn't think we would be the local hang out for the kids as we don't have a game room or anything big for them to hang out. I am so grateful the couch gives them a place to hang out, and a garage full of toys gives them a desire to hang at our place.
*Watching my little man in the bathtub having a blast with only two cups, and realizing that he is about to pass the moment of innocence where he plays so happily in the bathtub saying, "Mommy, come here!" every two seconds to show me a new trick he discovered, and thereby enjoying every second of seeing his new made up tricks while I still can.
*Dancing with my boys when Shawners danced to the radio outside the car when I picked him up from school, and when Justinbustin danced to the song playing on my computer. My favorite part is the spontaneity with which they break out into dance when they hear a song. I didn't do that as a kid and I LOVE that they do, and of course I dance with them. This afternoon when Justinbustin and I were dancing I said, "I love dancing with you guys." and he says, "I love it, too." Melt my heart.
*Being able to pick up and clean my house. I didn't know I could be so grateful for something so mundane, but being able to do it is a blessing.
*Brando setting up a couples' massage for him and I with my favorite masseuse for me. If nothing else good came out of me being in bed on my back the last week, this stands alone by itself. What a treat.
*Having good conversations with Justinbustin about schoolwork and setting up the perimeters of certain projects in school needing his full attention to details and other projects that aren't very important just need the requirements met and neat handwriting. I told him to let me know which category a project falls into so that I don't stress him out about schoolwork. I want him so desperately to know, "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might." Ecclesiastes 9:10, but the truth is certain projects in school just aren't worth your energy at the expense of other projects. And I can see the stress I put on him when I try to emphasize those unimportant subjects at the cost of the projects (and extracurricular) activities that DO matter.
*Our old, torn courch finding a new home in the garage as a hangout for the local neighborhood kids and the boys as they put the space heater on, play their DS, bike around, play ball, play music, and chat. I didn't think we would be the local hang out for the kids as we don't have a game room or anything big for them to hang out. I am so grateful the couch gives them a place to hang out, and a garage full of toys gives them a desire to hang at our place.
*Watching my little man in the bathtub having a blast with only two cups, and realizing that he is about to pass the moment of innocence where he plays so happily in the bathtub saying, "Mommy, come here!" every two seconds to show me a new trick he discovered, and thereby enjoying every second of seeing his new made up tricks while I still can.
Monday, November 1, 2010
How much is genes? How much is nature?
How much is parents? How much is environment? How much is choice?
Where do my kids get their love of dancing from? It's not in my genes. It's in Shawner's genes, but Justinbustin is the first one on the dance floor. Is it because I love it now? Is it choice? Is it the environment that I love it now?
To know things you have to be taught, or have observed, or innately know and one day be confirmed. Kids who aren't taught or aren't given a chance to observe have less variety. I've always had that belief. About my kids. About myself. The thing is, I don't feel like my kids have had much more chance to observe, be taught, or experience more than I did. Yet they have SO much more variety than I did. How much of it is choice?
I am so grateful for that.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Curious George
When Justinbustin was a baby, I showered him with Curious George memorabilia, calling Justinbustin my little monkey. Yesterday, in the grocery store, I saw a stuffed Curious George
and had a moment of nostalgia, feeling a little sad that he wouldn't be interested anymore. Little did I know Justinbustin would walk up a few seconds later and say, "CURIOUS GEORGE!!" grabbing him off the shelf and giving him a big hug. Of course, I had to get it for him with a huge smile on my face that he's still my baby, just a little. He came with a movie, and they watched it this morning, quite adorably.So exciting!
After a defeat last week of 29-0, Shawner's flag football coach apologized to the team saying they were outcoached. It's his first season and he didn't realize how fast the game went once the kids were on the field. This week he picked up the pace, brought in a defense coach, and ran a bunch of plays by the kids. They killed the other team on the field today with 29-15 AND the other team was a lot of bigger kids coached by the owner of the league, who coaches up to five teams a season, and usually has a team that has been together a long time. The other team was singing Happy Birthday to their team after the game so who knows how long this particular team of the owners has been together. Shawner's team was AHmazing!! Go Br*ncos!!
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