Monday, January 17, 2011

Inspiration

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert. Isaiah 43:18

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."
~Martin Luther King, Jr.

Text from KT:
"I think you may the one person on the planet that's not personally flawed."

What You're Worth: Why i won't work for free and neither should you
by Camels and Chocolate

A few months back, a well-known band came to me via their publicist wanting me to promote an event they’re sponsoring. It was a cool concept, in a fun place, and it would allow me to check another item off my Life List. The kicker? They weren’t going to pay me for my time or my effort.

The sad thing is that I briefly toyed with the idea, and I might have green lit it had it not been for SVV. “You’re a professional. You’ve been working as a journalist for a decade. Your time, your knowledge, your experience—this is all incredibly valuable to a company. You’re not doing anything for free.” I tried to negotiate with them—something that as both a female and a Southerner I’ve always grappled with—but they weren’t budging. Not understanding what social media is about, or even the power of the press, they thought covering my expenses to attend the event—an event that, mind you, I would be working—was payment enough. And so after much debate, I turned down the opportunity last week with some regrets.

But you know what? After a few days to ponder this precarious situation, I’m glad I said no.

When did it become acceptable not to pay for a service? I logged my years of interning, I more than paid my dues, I’ve slowly worked my way up the ladder in this tumultuous media climate, something that was not easy, nor fun at times. To backtrack so much at this point in my career would be a completely wrong move. I don’t write for magazines whose rates don’t make penning a piece worth my time; since when do I spend days on a project making money for other people through promotion, sponsorships, advertising dollars and Lord knows how many other benefits that come cascading down the shoulders (and pockets) of the corporations that drive these things? The short answer: not now, not ever.

And this is where the Internet is at fault and possibly the economy, too. There are so many people out there perfectly willing to give away their talent for no charge—or, nearly as bad, $10 to $20 a post—that a company knows if you say no, there are 10 other writers who will say yes. But that doesn’t make it even remotely OK. That doesn’t mean you should buy into it. Because until enough of us band together and say this isn’t right, companies will continue to think they can exploit our talents.

I graduated from journalism school. Before that, I interned at magazines, newspapers, a TV station. I was a columnist for a publication at the age of 20. I’d worked on my first guidebook for one of the biggest travel brands in the world by 23. I was hired as a researcher for Harper’s while still an undergrad. I started at Newsweek the day after I graduated college. You’ll sometimes see my name in books. I’ve written for more than 50 national magazines and newspapers. I can’t remember the last time an all-access concert pass paid the rent. And what makes any company think that I will work for free, that I don’t deserve to get paid for the exercise?

You wouldn’t ask a surgeon to operate on your heart free of charge (or for front row seats at opera). You wouldn’t expect a plumber to come out and fix your pipes for no fee (or in exchange for a sandwich). Heck, you don’t even allow a server at a restaurant to deliver your food without leaving a tip on top of an already-hefty dinner bill. Why are writers and other creatives any different?

Women, in general, tend to get the short end of the stick, too. It’s a proven fact. In my experience, we’re also not very keen on bargaining, on asking for what we deserve. SVV has gotten four raises in less than four years at his current company; every one of them was because he went to his boss and said (in not so many words), hey, you know what? I’m awesome and I deserve to be paid for my awesomeness. You should give me X amount of dollars more for my skill and expertise. And you can guess what happened next: His boss did just that. Every last time.

I, on the other hand, have worked for some of the same editors for years and have never summoned the nerve to ask for an increased rate. In some ways, I’m just happy to still be able to say I’m a magazine writer. Many of my colleagues aren’t so fortunate anymore. But that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be so bold in the future, that I shouldn’t make it a goal to work on the power of bargaining. Saying no to the band, something that was far from easy, was a baby step in that direction.

A fellow journalist friend, a male, who was a bureau chief at Newsweek for a decade, told me how a political magazine recently came to him with the offer to write an in-depth, 5,000-word piece for their publication. If you’re not in the journalism industry, you should know: Such an offer is a writer’s gold. We’re never given the space to write the long-form narratives or op-eds we often dream about.

He did the smart thing and responded saying he’d love such a gig, but how much did it pay? “$500,” the editor wrote back, though the friend now thinks, looking back, that the rate might have even been lower than that. $500 for 5,000 words. Ten paltry cents per well-thought-out word. (To put it in perspective, most national magazines continue to pay $2 a word as a starting rate, with more money given to their more established writers, meaning if this was a legit publication, he should have been paid $10,000 for such a story.)

Politely, he declined the assignment—he is after all, a well-known journalist, and to write such a story would take weeks of his time, weeks that could be spent elsewhere on much better paying gigs—at which point the editor shot back a very snarky retort saying that my friend should be honored to write such a piece for his magazine. Really? Is that truly what editors think these days? That well-trained, sought-after writers should be thankful for the chance to earn them money? Hardly.

My point here is to all you bloggers, to all you writers, to all you photographers, to all you creative types out there who feel like you’re not valued, here’s an epiphany: You’ll never be valued until you start to value yourself.

So I beg you: When you’re approached with such an opportunity, weigh the pros and cons. Is it a good career move? Are you getting anything meaningful out of it? What are you actually receiving for your time? Or is the company just trying to use you as one of these “cloud-sourced” money machines?

Whether you’re a beginning blogger with 100 readers or a veteran with 100,000, you’re valuable. And don’t forget it either. Because until you start to see your own self worth, how can you expect others to recognize it, too?

Friday, January 14, 2011

I've Never Had a Desire to Move to Seattle...

until now. Solely for this reason:

Amazon Fresh delivers fresh vegetables and fruit.... what?! The pictures alone are drool worthy.
I was ready to place my order until I saw the zipcodes they deliver to didn't include mine, and then realized they only deliver to the Seattle area. Boo. Seriously, I already love Amazon for their prime shipping, add in fresh vegetables and fruit and I'm sold.

It's Time Cont'd...

More for Today, hers in italics:

ok, but your diet sucks. you need to fatten it up...keep up w/ me, sheesh!!!
You know what's wierd...you get 2 pts less than me, yet I am filling up 4 inches of body MORE than you. wtf?!?!
not fair at all.
i've been cleanin' all mornin'. want to call you but i bit the inside of my mouth yesterday towards the back and it is so swollen and ouchie!!! again, wtf?! it gets worse cuz i keep biten it, i guess, cuz its swollen so bigger, ya know. i know, gross.

disgusting. try drinking noni or taking garlic? or swishing with salt water.

That is weird that I get 2 pts less than you but it's because i'm smaller. you need more sustenance. kapeshe?

That's ok, i've been doing stuff on the computer.

Going to pick up the kids soon.

10 cherries - 1 pt (thank goodness for Costco)

salmon salad...spinach, tomatoes 1 1/2 tblspns. of italian viniagrette = 5 pts.
at 16 pts, so far :( if I exercise tonight, that would add pts, i may HAVE to exercise!

Yum, if I liked salmon.

Chocolate Chip Clif Kid Z Bar 2 points (yes I'm eating my kids snacks)

how many points does exercising add?

Clif Z Bar wasn't very satisfying boo. Cherries were a much better choice.

It's Time

FINALLY! Somebody to be weight accountable with. For some reason I've thrown on a few pounds the last week, and I am ready to not go there again.

Fortunately, my sister is at her last point, too, and so we are doing Weight Watchers together. Really, it's all about portion control and making sure what you eat doesn't have too much fat, or if it does, that it has enough fiber to make it worth it. I've done it before a little, but this time I'm doing it for certain. In one day I'm back down to what I was before this week. Yay!

Here are our emails back and forth with hers in italics:

Yesterday:

eating

half a large bagel, 3 points
1 cup strawberries, 1 point

you're so silly, LOL

10 cherries, 1 point [cherries are a low-glycemic food that help make you feel satisfied and full longer according to the Fat Flush Plan - a perfect afternoon snack, and something I happened to have on hand]

yeah, but if i don't send it to someone i'll cheat lol

ok, lol, that works...let's keep it up...
So, thursday:
oatmeal 4 pts
sandwich from subway 5 pts
=9 pts so far :-)

You're at 5 pts.....bitch :-P

[forgot to email her my 4 point tortilla soup with chicken for dinner, but told her on the phone, and my 9 point ice cream last night YUM, but told her this am]

Today:

2 eggs w/ cheese 6 pts.
water w/ lemon/honey 1 pt.


f'ing a

1/2 biscuit w/ lots of butter and even more jam...3 (prob. 4) pts.
so i'm at 11 pts and the day hasn't even started. being skinny is over rated. i'm gonna starve the rest of the day...lots of water water water to fill me up...remind me!!!!
so i had an idea...i always eat a ton after working out, so i think i'm gonna try working out after the kids go to bed, then go to bed, so that i don't eat....we'll see how it works tonight.
i'll get my headset and talk to you in a bit....

3 egg whites, uncooked red onion, .9 oz goat cheese - 2 points - kinda gross to make and look at but the goat cheese & onion made it taste good
unsweetened hot tea - 0 points

haha, being skinny is over rated yes, but not putting on too much weight isn't!!

Yes, lots of water is important - need to remind myself too.

Maybe I'll work out with you tonight - I've always wanted to do it at night, too, after the kids go to bed as well for the same reason lol.

Friday, January 7, 2011

Must Study

Having a good relationship with your home.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Oops I Did It Again

I thought my arm was fully healed, so I went full force back into blogging and facebooking.

Turns out it's not fully healed, and if I don't stop aggravating my arm via the computer and phone I'll need surgery. Either way, I'll be dealing with taking care of it for ten years. I burst into tears when the occupational therapist told me said news this morning, even though she had said otherwise previously.

But, I've stayed away from the phone and the computer the rest of the day, done my exercises diligently and completely, and I am better this evening.

So, goodbye facebook and texting, once again. I don't think I will ever get to fully enjoy you again as I have in the past. Goodbye to an era of my life. I get to join the ranks of older people who don't text much - or maybe just smart people who don't text much, and get to learn to talk on the phone and hopefully enjoy it once again.

Monday, January 3, 2011

A New Day

This weekend was such an upper that I knew the down was coming. I just didn't expect it to feel quite so alone.

No school for me this semester. I'm taking a break - to find a job, to support Brando, to de-freakin-stress, to whatever. It's a weird feeling. It's been me for a year and a half now. It's a good feeling, though.

No school may be contributing to the alone feeling - I'm alone when the boys and Brando go to school and there's no classroom environment and what intellectual stimulation and little conversation that provides when one pays attention to break up the monotony.

I woke up early this morning to get the boys to school the minute the doors opened so they would have some time to settle in and get used to being back in school again. Shawners was so cute last night he says, "I don't know why, but I'm nervous about tomorrow." I told him that was normal because there will be a lot of people (something that makes him nervous) and he hasn't done it for two weeks, but the good thing is everyone else hasn't been there for two weeks either and all of them have taken vacations, seen grandparents & family that they will be excited to talk about. Even though he said he won't talk about it, I said maybe somebody else will mention something that will remind him of something that happened on vacation that he will want to talk about. After that, he said, "Can we go through the schedule in the morning?" to which I said yes, and he continues, "Wake up, take the dogs potty, feed and water the dogs, do my chores real quick, get dressed, eat breakfast, brush teeth and hair, get water and snack, and put back pack in car." So organized, that one. I told him wow, that's awesome that he thought about all that and it reminded me I needed to wake up and make them lunch, which is part of the reason I was able to get up early this morning and get their lunches together and get out the door before the school doors opened (a huge feat for me - not for them).

And now the house is quiet and I feel quite alone. There is a lot to do around the house, but now I see it and think once it's done I have nothing else to do. Hopefully that won't stop me from doing it this time like it has in the past. This is my down. And this is me trying to be okay with it.