Marriage

The local morning talk show had a discussion this morning about marriage. One of the DJs was stating his marriage was mediocre. That there was nothing magical about it. He called his wife to confirm honestly, and she agreed. He started off by asking her if she'd rather be in a mediocre marriage or single. She said a mediocre marriage. They went on to discuss it and she mentions he's acting like it's a take it or leave it marriage. He explains he's not, it's just that there is nothing spectacular or amazing or magical about their marriage. She jokingly replies everyone on facebook has amazing marriages. He laughs, and says facebook isn't real life and you can't judge anything by facebook, and they go on to joke back and forth about how they have a mediocre house, not amazing but good, mediocre cars, not amazing but they work, mediocre looks, not amazing but they get by. They joke about their first date nine years ago today and she says, "It was mediocre." Then, he says she has a spectacular chest and there is nothing mediocre about it. She ends the conversation saying, "Have an okay day." They both laugh and say, "I love you."

I disagree. If you can have that kind of conversation and still love each other and laugh, you have something magical.

It all got me to thinking about my marriage and thinking if I have something magical. I do. When we can connect on the level we have been, it's magical. That *is* the magic. Being able to go through a rough patch together and come out on the other end laughing, snuggling, and talking.

Last night, I was SO cranky. I was just irritable. But when I stopped for dinner for the boys on the way home, Brando told me what they wanted, and then I asked what he wanted. He said nothing, but I love you. I bought him a coke any way, because he loves those. And when I got home, he recognized that even though I knew I was being irritable it wasn't with him, it just was. And he hugged me and spent time with me talking to me and asking about my day and what was getting to me, just like I needed. That is magical to me.

Our real life magical conversations:

 Love using Siri to vent. It comes out completely grammatically incorrect, but it gets it all out without stressing over every word.

 Yes, he really can't pick up when he has customers coming in and out, and tellers he needs to approve transactions with. Sometimes I wonder why I didn't stick it out with him in real estate so we could have our own schedule, but then I look at where our relationship is and wonder if we would be here, or even together at all, if I had stuck it out. And so I pray one day we can go back to having our own schedule, even if it means more hours on the other hand. In the meantime, I am so, so, so grateful for our relationship and this amazing man.

He had bought me a new case for my iPhone, which made it too close to the size of the old iPhone. I'm sticking with my iFrogz he bought me before that makes my phone SO tiny just like it is and loving it. And, yes, I've dropped it at least five times and the phone is perfect. Case is scratched only on the corners, but that's the point. Also, he thinks his car makes him have allergic reactions. The trunk leaks and I believe mold has grown back there. Think it makes me allergic, too. Finally, have you heard of those videos Sh*t People Say? They have a perfect one for Sh*t Austinites Say. The link I sent him was for Sh*t _____ Say, but he hadn't seen the others first. Oops.

 Here's where we had an irritable, cranky conversation over the phone with each other after his, "SERIOUSLY? Shit. Ok. I'll figure something out." where I was like, "Chill. I can bring them something on the way home. Why are you freaking out?" ...my irritation had gotten to him and I realized it. Thus, the asking what he wanted and the coke I brought home for him.

And I came home to my beautiful flowers on my island, a "you love me" from him after I gave him his coke, and a shower together where he asked me questions until I got it all out. As Allison would say, I love this man. That is magical to me.

Sidenote: Have you ever listened to the lyrics of Your Body Is a Wonderland by John Mayer? It's all about making love all day in a hotel room. Yeah. I just realized that. Up until that point, it was a song I totally would've left playing in the background with my boys in the car or house. I must've thought wonderland was like playing in clouds with rainbows. Not a sex land. Now I love the song in a *different* way ;) .